Part of me wants to say I wish I were a child again, or I wish I didn't have to be an adult and grow up. But I know, if I say that, it will be a lie. I do enjoy being an adult and making certain decisions. Obviously some decisions are not as simple as chocolate cake or chocolate ice cream, and some require more thought and processing.
A "friend" of mine (yes, I'm back with the quotation marks) suggested that I come to visit him. If I bought the airline ticket he would take care of accommodation and everything else during my stay. Having not spent any quality time with my "friend" I jump at the opportunity. I start looking at flights and look at my schedule to see when can I get the cheapest flight out of my available "vacations." I found one available in October and said okay I'm coming then. We're both very excited at the opportunity to be engrossed in each other completely for 10 days. When all of this happened, I was dead broke and knew I had a good pay cheque coming in the following week, so I wasn't too worried about it. As time passed, and the days went by, getting closer and closer to when I receive my wages, reality started to sink in. If reality were a person, I'd punch it right there and then, but alas it's not. The truth started to creep around me like fog coming from a harbor or smoke from burning incense. The reality is that I have other responsibilities I should take care of. I don't want to say instead of spending it on a plane ticket to go somewhere. I should be helping my dad who is my provider while at university. I mean my dad has been there for me well before university, so if I can help him out and ease his load, why not right? I also a bit of debt that if I can, I should pay off right? All these things start sinking in and I beginning to subconsciously weigh in everything. The final decision is that I am not travelling, or at least not as intended, and I am going to be responsible and adult as my "friend" put it and pay my school fees or something of that sort.
This was a difficult decision for me because I have matured and I have become more responsible mentally. If I hadn't I would have easily said I don't care, I want to travel, I want to see my "friend," I'm going. But because of this maturity and this growth the reality and needs were stacked up against the wants and although there were close, the needs won. It's tough being an adult, but even with that, I still don't think I'd want to wear baby diapers again.
Monday, July 11, 2011
Wednesday, July 6, 2011
And it hit me...
I have this "friend" (and yes I did use quotation marks) that really inspires me. By day he is a mild mannered mail man but by night he transforms into...okay I'm just being silly. My "friend" (yes I am going to use quotation marks every time) is a poet, singer and in my mind at least an activist. He's an artsy kinda man and he inspires me to continue exploring the arts.
I was speaking to him this morning and said "you know last night just before I fell asleep I was thinking I wish I could sing as well as you do, and could write amazing things like you do. Then I thought about us and it hit me (like a tonne of bricks) that I actually complement you. You sing and write poetry and I dance. How cool would it be if we performed together?" [that was more or less the conversation...although there are quotes that's not exactly how it went down, anyways...I digress]. It was in that moment I realised hey, I'm not half as bad as I think I am. I may not be able to write emotion evoking poetry or sing like the angels in heaven, but what I can do if paired with those talents that I don't have, can create something so amazingly beautiful that it's okay if I can't do those things. What I can do, if I do it beyond the best of my ability will carry me to be beautifully creative and an emotion evoking dancer. And I smiled (a big wide toothy smile) and felt proud of my contribution to life.
We may admire and even desire things in others. Sometimes we can work and develop such skills and/or talents that we admire, and other times we can't. We should look within ourselves and see what can add to that pot that we so desire, to create something even more amazing, even more beautiful, even more inspiring.
Be inspired.
Go forth and inspire.
I was speaking to him this morning and said "you know last night just before I fell asleep I was thinking I wish I could sing as well as you do, and could write amazing things like you do. Then I thought about us and it hit me (like a tonne of bricks) that I actually complement you. You sing and write poetry and I dance. How cool would it be if we performed together?" [that was more or less the conversation...although there are quotes that's not exactly how it went down, anyways...I digress]. It was in that moment I realised hey, I'm not half as bad as I think I am. I may not be able to write emotion evoking poetry or sing like the angels in heaven, but what I can do if paired with those talents that I don't have, can create something so amazingly beautiful that it's okay if I can't do those things. What I can do, if I do it beyond the best of my ability will carry me to be beautifully creative and an emotion evoking dancer. And I smiled (a big wide toothy smile) and felt proud of my contribution to life.
We may admire and even desire things in others. Sometimes we can work and develop such skills and/or talents that we admire, and other times we can't. We should look within ourselves and see what can add to that pot that we so desire, to create something even more amazing, even more beautiful, even more inspiring.
Be inspired.
Go forth and inspire.
Tuesday, July 5, 2011
The Addiction
My addiction continues
until I OD and get over you
but only for a moment, relative to the movement of time
for in time
I'll be back, hooked on your every word,
your every desire;
hanging from your every thought
and every conversation.
My addiction continues
possibly until death
or some sort of an overload
from which I can no longer return.
My addiction continues,
but there must be a reason
why I can't get off this drug.
Seconds,
Minutes,
Hours,
Days, weeks to months go by and I'm fine
until one day I get the sensation
to sample your sweetness
and I forget about the connection
and your power over me.
My drug, my poison,
I love how you consume me.
until I OD and get over you
but only for a moment, relative to the movement of time
for in time
I'll be back, hooked on your every word,
your every desire;
hanging from your every thought
and every conversation.
My addiction continues
possibly until death
or some sort of an overload
from which I can no longer return.
My addiction continues,
but there must be a reason
why I can't get off this drug.
Seconds,
Minutes,
Hours,
Days, weeks to months go by and I'm fine
until one day I get the sensation
to sample your sweetness
and I forget about the connection
and your power over me.
My drug, my poison,
I love how you consume me.
Monday, July 4, 2011
Life Is A...
Life is a:
- stage. Get ready to perform
- field. Get ready to play
- canvas. Get ready to paint
- plate. Get ready to cook.
Friday, July 1, 2011
Growth
I've said "maybe I''m getting old" but I think it's more of maybe I'm changing. The things that once satisfied me no longer do. I wonder if there's something wrong with me, but it dawned on me that there's nothing wrong with change. I should embrace this change I am experiencing internally. I should explore it and find out what can satisfy me and make me feel good and happy. At this point in my life I need this change, and I need to find out what will my new coordinates be.
To keep myself busy I've start crafting again and have made a few hair fascinators and probably will continue doing them. I'm trying to think what else can I engage in, what else can I explore especially given my current income and responsibilities. I don't have an answer as yet, but until the coordinates are set I will continue to ride the wave of change.
Wish me luck.
To keep myself busy I've start crafting again and have made a few hair fascinators and probably will continue doing them. I'm trying to think what else can I engage in, what else can I explore especially given my current income and responsibilities. I don't have an answer as yet, but until the coordinates are set I will continue to ride the wave of change.
Wish me luck.
Wednesday, June 29, 2011
Words From Drake
Who would have thought that I'd be quoting the rapper/singer/actor Drake in a post.
I've picked up my glue gun, needle and thread and began creating and experimenting. I may not become famous or get rich off of these little crafty things I let my fingers do, but it's something that keeps me entertained and not bored and frustrated with life. I turned 24 of Saturday and the Tuesday before my birthday I went to the club and had an epiphany, yes I know, an epiphany at the club? I wondered if it was just me getting older, but I no longer enjoy going to club. It's not exciting, nor is it entertaining, nor invigorating or stimulating. I go and I subconsciously force myself to have fun or rather not feel bored at that very real moment in time. Should I have to entertain myself or be silly for me to enjoy myself at the club? I'm not too convinced of that. Someone can easily say oh you're going to the wrong club and they're playing the wrong music, which very well may be true but still...maybe I need to take a break from the club scene and get into other mentally stimulating things.
Thankfully I've had a few conversations with friends about various topics that truly were mentally stimulating and it was refreshing and invigorating to experience those things. I shall challenge myself to have more of those discussions and not only on controversial topics like religion or the development of my country, but on simple topics like energy and remaining motivated. I shall challenge myself to speak to more people about important topics and not about frivolous things like what shall I wear to work tomorrow. I challenge you as well to step outside your comfort zone and having those difficult conversations that help you understand the people around you better. Don't just talk, listen. Listen to what the other person is saying and don't be so quick to judge them.
Today we are beginning a challenge of growth, exploration and stimulation. Let the journey begin!
"Everybody dies, but not everybody lives."The reason why so many people love this phrase is because there is so much power in it. We (myself included) go through our day to day activities barely living. It's a routine that we must endure, we must succumb to, a road we must travel. We often sit and dream about all the adventurous and exciting things that we could be doing if. If this were that way, if that were that way, if we had this, this, that, that, that and those two over there as well. We let the ifs of life bog us down into boring, and unsatisfying.
I've picked up my glue gun, needle and thread and began creating and experimenting. I may not become famous or get rich off of these little crafty things I let my fingers do, but it's something that keeps me entertained and not bored and frustrated with life. I turned 24 of Saturday and the Tuesday before my birthday I went to the club and had an epiphany, yes I know, an epiphany at the club? I wondered if it was just me getting older, but I no longer enjoy going to club. It's not exciting, nor is it entertaining, nor invigorating or stimulating. I go and I subconsciously force myself to have fun or rather not feel bored at that very real moment in time. Should I have to entertain myself or be silly for me to enjoy myself at the club? I'm not too convinced of that. Someone can easily say oh you're going to the wrong club and they're playing the wrong music, which very well may be true but still...maybe I need to take a break from the club scene and get into other mentally stimulating things.
Thankfully I've had a few conversations with friends about various topics that truly were mentally stimulating and it was refreshing and invigorating to experience those things. I shall challenge myself to have more of those discussions and not only on controversial topics like religion or the development of my country, but on simple topics like energy and remaining motivated. I shall challenge myself to speak to more people about important topics and not about frivolous things like what shall I wear to work tomorrow. I challenge you as well to step outside your comfort zone and having those difficult conversations that help you understand the people around you better. Don't just talk, listen. Listen to what the other person is saying and don't be so quick to judge them.
Today we are beginning a challenge of growth, exploration and stimulation. Let the journey begin!
Monday, June 27, 2011
When There Is No Path
After my bout of being unmotivated I am re-energized and ready to continue on that path to greatness.
But what do you do when you want to achieve something big, something fabulous, something great and there are no directions, no guidance no nothing to lead you in the right way? You create your own path to success! It may be a difficult challenge but when you receive that victory, that success, nothing else will matter. All the struggles and hard work will make that victory taste even sweeter.
This is my motivation for my dreams. I understand fully that what I want to do is to venture into unknown waters, but that doesn't stop me. The end product is more important to me than anything else. I'm a bit tired of people telling me don't come back to Saint Lucia because there's nothing there for me. Why do people always have a one-sided view? Yes things look dismal in Saint Lucia but by encouraging everyone to stay away how can development and progress be made? It may take me years to return to Saint Lucia, but I want to know that I have made a significant contribution to my country. That's why I want to go back. I want to make a positive and significant contribution to my country. I feel like I owe it to my home to give back. I don't doubt that it's gonna be difficult, but this difficulty does not deter me, and I hope it never gets the better of me.
What dreams lead you into uncharted waters? How do you find motivation to keep going? Let me know.
What A Birthday
For various reasons I shall not divulge the happenings of my birthday on my blog. I wish I had taken a proper photo of my hair style, because it did look lovely, and it has been a while since I've styled it up nicely.
The lessons I have learnt from my birthday may be odd ones but I know the reasoning behind it.
The first is that everyone sees things differently.
The second is that what is "normal" or a usual occurrence will take priority over that which is not the norm.
The third is that I take things to heart too easily. I need to learn to shake things off and not let it bother me so much. I'm a bit too uptight.
All in all, my birthday was a lovely 24hrs and I enjoyed those 24 hrs significantly. I don't think there is anything in particular I would change about it.
The lessons I have learnt from my birthday may be odd ones but I know the reasoning behind it.
The first is that everyone sees things differently.
The second is that what is "normal" or a usual occurrence will take priority over that which is not the norm.
The third is that I take things to heart too easily. I need to learn to shake things off and not let it bother me so much. I'm a bit too uptight.
All in all, my birthday was a lovely 24hrs and I enjoyed those 24 hrs significantly. I don't think there is anything in particular I would change about it.
Tuesday, June 21, 2011
Can We Save The World By Planting Trees?
I came across the discussion of whether trees can save the world and thought I would chime in about it. Whether anyone read my chime is beyond me, but I figured why not share my thoughts on this matter with you. You are more than welcome to chime in by leaving a comment about you views on the question.
Can we save Earth by planting trees?
I believe that trees are an integral part of the remediation and restoration of the Earth's atmosphere, hydrosphere and lithosphere, however I believe that this question is a bit too simplified when we are taking into account what is happening to the world presently.
If we believe that by planting one hundred billion trees we will save the world we will be instore for a very rude awakening. This is like being a diabetic, taking a lot of insulin and not changing your diet and/or lifestyle. Planting trees does not address the source of the Earth's destruction, which in my mind is consumption. I believe consumption is the root of the Earth's destruction primarily because our rate of consumption is not a sustainable one. If we reduce the quantity of things we consume as well as improve the quality of them alongside planting trees we won't save the Earth, but it will be a great start to getting the recovery on it's way.
What is you view on this topic? Do you think planting trees is all we have to do? Do you think planting trees is useless and something else needs to be done? I'm curious to hear your point of view.
Cheers!
Can we save Earth by planting trees?
I believe that trees are an integral part of the remediation and restoration of the Earth's atmosphere, hydrosphere and lithosphere, however I believe that this question is a bit too simplified when we are taking into account what is happening to the world presently.
If we believe that by planting one hundred billion trees we will save the world we will be instore for a very rude awakening. This is like being a diabetic, taking a lot of insulin and not changing your diet and/or lifestyle. Planting trees does not address the source of the Earth's destruction, which in my mind is consumption. I believe consumption is the root of the Earth's destruction primarily because our rate of consumption is not a sustainable one. If we reduce the quantity of things we consume as well as improve the quality of them alongside planting trees we won't save the Earth, but it will be a great start to getting the recovery on it's way.
What is you view on this topic? Do you think planting trees is all we have to do? Do you think planting trees is useless and something else needs to be done? I'm curious to hear your point of view.
Cheers!
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