I am not big on New Years celebrations. I'm one of those persons that wants to crawl into a dark hole for about two months - December and January and not think about a new year dawning and all that jazz. The primary reason for it is because twice a year it hits me, another year is dawning and another year of my life is gone, and I have nothing to show for it. I have nothing to say hey this is what I've accomplished. It weighs me down and makes me sad to know that I'm not truly happy, but happy at moments, and that I'm still not living my life, but living to please others. It bothers me that I don't feel like I'm going somewhere and I have something to do, that I'm merely floating around in this crazy world.
I usually try to hide from New Years.
But somehow, this year I don't want the stroke of midnight to catch me at home, or in my current town. No. I want to be a different place to ring in a different year. 2012 is my Champagne Year and I have dubbed it "The Year of The Empress." In 2012 it will be difficult but I will be happy. I will have a goal and I will work towards it. I will explore life and myself, and push myself to become a great woman. I will retrain myself to be mentally powerful, self motivated, hard working and fun loving. I will culture myself to not be ignorant, temperamental or short tempered. I will culture myself to be graceful, sophisticated, educated and wise. From 2012 onward I shall be responsible and build on that responsibility a kingdom of comfort for my family.
Yes, 2012 is MY year.
No comments:
Post a Comment