Are You Proud?

You know what, I can't say I'm proud of everything I've done in my life. However, I can say that I have very few regrets. Yes we may do some messed up things, things that in retrospect we wonder what was I thinking?! But even after the smoke clears and and ashes settle we still don't say I wish that fire had never been burned.

I don't regret a number of things because either I've learnt from what has transpired or I've enjoyed what I've done. The few things I regret are things that brought immense emotional pain to me, pain that I really did not need to feel. Yes there are circumstances that we need to go through to better understand ourselves. The circumstances I'm talking about are totally unnecessary. I hope there are no more situations like this in my future. I surely can do without them.


Do you regret things you've done in your life? Or do you have the YOLO kind of motto where you regret nothing and seize every moment. Do share.

-The Empress

Birds of a Feather...

With meaningful cliches like "Show me your friends and I will tell you who you are," out there, it only makes sense to surround yourself with people who are like-minded like you or oriented in a similar manner as you. Their energy coupled with yours is sure to get you far.

I think one of the toughest things in life is letting someone you love or care about go. Be it a family member or a friend. Be it death or just moving on with your life.

I want to touch on the latter. There are times in everyone's life when they change, they grown. When such a metamorphosis begins you want catalysts or least supporting elements with you. Dead weight isn't what you want retarding the process. Sometimes there are peple in our lives that cannot grasp the concept of this metamorphosis. They are stuck seeing the world with rose tinted glasses. How does one deal with this dead weight?

I'm the type of person who has trouble throwing things away (sometimes). I'm not a hoarder. I repear - I am not a hoarder. As far as I can remember I've never said to anyone "Never speak to me again." I prefer the "feed with a long spoon" approach where you gradually decrease the amount of time and information given to a particular person. They find other people to attach to and you continue your growth and development. I'm not saying this is the best way, I'm just saying this is what works for me. I use this method because every so often I like to check up on people, see if they've started their transformation. If they have and they want me to be a part of it, I help and support them. If they haven't, I keep my distance again.

I think with over 6 billion people in the world, there should be at least 2 billion that are not "dead weight." All 2 billion may not be oriented in your exact direction but they should be close enough for you to surround yourself with them.

Not for the "new year" but for life - surround yourself with good people.

-The Empress

Hold Back And Stop Living

I'm a young lady. 24 years old. Good looking. Intelligent. Charismatic, or at least I like to think I am hahaha. I'm also single. And have been single for the majority of my life. Some days it doesn't bother me, and others I will not even hesitate to inform you it bothers every ounce of my being. Many if not all of my closest friends are single, and quite often we sit and ponder the reason for this. I'm not sure where I'm going with this post, but then again, when am I ever?

Today is Christmas and of course I announce that it's 6 months 'til my birthday. This upcoming birthday isn't just any birthday. It's what some call your Champagne Birthday, which essentially means you're turning the age of the date you were born. Not the month, just the date. I'm really wondering where I'm going with this, but still I continue to type and hope you continue to read. I'm sitting here feeling a bit sad because I want a "friend" of mine to talk to me. I know some people will be rolling their eyes and saying well if you want to talk to him, message him or call him. The thing is I have been. I hate being ignored. It doesn't sit well with me at all. Okay, I'm not going to get into this here and right now. Moving on...

What I'm trying to get at is, I've been holding on to a dream and holding out on life because of one person. Because of one person that I know is not doing the same thing, and quite frankly I can't blame him. It's difficult knowing that my entire life can happen and when I'm 60 I reconnect with this person because we were meant to be at that time. Something about this idea scares me. I am admitting it. It scares me to not know when we will connect and connect properly. The unknown of not being able to just live and just do whatever and dive head first into situations and swim out of them easily or barely making it out of the shark's jaw and then coming out of the water into his arms bother me. But I know I can't hold on and stop living because of this fear or this unknown. I have to let go and live. So maybe this is a declaration of some sort; of me saying that I'm not waiting for you or waiting for the right time to come. I'm dancing to the music playing and when the song changes and it's the right time, you will ask to have the dance and we shall dance the night away.

I'm not sure this makes any sense at all. But I choose to live.

Let the planning begin

My exams ended on Monday December 19th and I said I would give myself one week to relax and the next week I will begin my school work to get ahead and plan for my future (as I normally do). Well today is Friday and I'm tired of "relaxing" which happens to be doing nothing or just cleaning in one way or the other.

I'm here more or less alone for the holidays and although I appreciate the time alone I feel like I have nothing to do. I'm sure I can catch up on major reading or watching shows I haven't been able to follow during the semester but it's not the same. I think I'm always under so much pressure that it doesn't feel normal to not be. Anyway, so apart from cleaning and getting ahead in my studies I'm also going to look at the "Where do I see myself in x years." I'm scheduled, correction: I am going to graduate in June 2012 and receive my Honours degree in August 2012 and hence I need to have some sort of an idea as to what I want to do and how I'm going to do it.

I do know that I honestly am not ready to do my Masters just yet. I know there are a number of people who are disappointed in this. Truth be told I'd like to work for about 10 years and then get my Masters. By then everyone I know would have had 2 Ph.D's but I honestly don't care. I can't make decisions for my life based on what other people are doing. I need to make decisions that I feel are best for me and that I can handle. In 5 years time I would like to enter my field of interest with a secure foot. And that is what I am going to do.

I often say there's method to my madness, and I truly believe it. Whether others can see it or believe it is another question, but that doesn't bother me. I know me and what I want well enough. I feel grounded and focused. Now is the time to apply these emotions and secure my dreams. I should have a back up plan, but not just yet. I believe this will work out.

This is just the begin of the my rise to achieve my goal. 2012 is the year when the slingshot will be stretched and released, and I shall be propelled in the right direction to live my dreams. Let nothing stop me, let nothing stop you. We're both going to achieve our dreams.

Don't wish me luck. Help me along my journey.

Best wishes
-The Empress

New Tab!!

Hello hello! As part of my procrastination (smh) I've added a new tab on my blog entitled BOOKS I'VE READ!! Check it out and see the books I've been reading and suggest some new ones for me to add to my repertoire! You can leave the title and author in the comments section or email me at redempressvee@gmail.com

Cheers!
-The Empress

Procrastination

I'm not even sure what's the point of this post. I'm telling you this from the start. I'm on a break from trying to complete a research paper before I begin studying for an exam. I'm trying very hard not to procrastinate, or at least do it as little as possible. Who invented the word procrastination? Maybe if there were no word there would be no action...good rationale don't you think? Procrastination is the demise of many students and even adults. We learn our lesson in the moment and once that moment has past it is lost. So maybe we never learn our lesson at all?? Procrastination...

Okay, no more procrastinating for me. I'm off to do some work. Toodles!

Mind Over Matter

I am not big on New Years celebrations. I'm one of those persons that wants to crawl into a dark hole for about two months - December and January and not think about a new year dawning and all that jazz. The primary reason for it is because twice a year it hits me, another year is dawning and another year of my life is gone, and I have nothing to show for it. I have nothing to say hey this is what I've accomplished. It weighs me down and makes me sad to know that I'm not truly happy, but happy at moments, and that I'm still not living my life, but living to please others. It bothers me that I don't feel like I'm going somewhere and I have something to do, that I'm merely floating around in this crazy world.

I usually try to hide from New Years.

But somehow, this year I don't want the stroke of midnight to catch me at home, or in my current town. No. I want to be a different place to ring in a different year. 2012 is my Champagne Year and I have dubbed it "The Year of The Empress." In 2012 it will be difficult but I will be happy. I will have a goal and I will work towards it. I will explore life and myself, and push myself to become a great woman. I will retrain myself to be mentally powerful, self motivated, hard working and fun loving. I will culture myself to not be ignorant, temperamental or short tempered. I will culture myself to be graceful, sophisticated, educated and wise. From 2012 onward I shall be responsible and build on that responsibility a kingdom of comfort for my family.

Yes, 2012 is MY year.

Can We Change?

I've realised that I cannot begin writing a post and then come back to it. I never do. Instead of deleting the post I began many months ago, I've decided to just share with you what I had written before I stopped. Maybe I will pick it up at another time, possible from a different angle? Feel free to leave a comment or two. The post has not been proof read either.

I began writing one post and realised that I rant quite often instead of writing a piece that can be a diving board for discussion on the particular topic that is making me disgruntled. Hence, I am attempting to create such said diving board. Let me know how I did lol.

Quite often I wonder, can we change? We have been hearing about climate change and loss in biodiversity; we have seen the effects of our actions not only in recent times but essentially from colonial times, if not before, of our negative relationship with the environment. Yet still, after all this time, we cannot live in harmony, or at least diminish the negative effects we have on the environment. I was on Twitter and a friend tweeted about Troy Davis. He had tweeted about this before but today I decided to check out who was Troy Davis and what his story was. I got very perturbed by what I read and decided, after I too tweeted about how stupid it was, to find something else to read about to help me calm down. My Environmental Law prof usually asks at the beginning of class what's going on in the world in terms of Environmental Law, so I decided to check out the environmental news. I came across an article in The Guardian (a British newspaper) about fossil fuel subsidies being cut and monies being given to developing nations to help combat climate change. I thought maybe I would share my two cents of thought on the matter with you.

What do I think needs to be done to combat climate change?I don't think there is any one thing that can be done, neither do I think that any one thing is more important. My opinion is that a combination of efforts need to be executed for there to be sufficient change.
For sure our attitudes need to change. The saying "Without The Earth humans will die, but without humans The Earth will live" is so true! I was born and raised a Christian, so my teachings have said God entrusted The Earth to humans. The mentality that humans have of we can do what we want, how we want with The Earth is ridiculous. Yes, matter and energy are neither made nor created but merely transformed from one form to other is true, however, one thing we clearly forget to take into account is the factor of time. Time from the perspective of a human is instantaneous, very short in comparison to time from the perspective of The Earth. Geologists and other professions in the physical Geography field will tell you that it takes millions of years for the things we see before our eyes to be formed by The Earth. How does it not make sense that the rate at which we are using it up is not sustainable?
This brings me to my next point: We need to reduce our rate of consumption. We live in a very materialistic world, where how much you posses determines you worth and your importance. Hence we crave items, we crave physical demonstrations of how much we have. We purchase and acquire items that we do not need. We obtain them in the name of technology, comfort and standard of living. We waste and get new things for the fun of it and for our own personal enjoyment. At this point I would like to pause and just point out that not once have I said you, or y'all or not included myself in this. I am a part of the problem. I admit. I am not perfect. I am not sitting on a high horse saying this is what you need to do, no. This is what we need to do. But yes, I digressed, as usual. Back to my point. I think I have spoken about this on the blog, or maybe it was the other blog I started and stopped, but did you ever wonder why Reduce was the first R in the 3 Rs? It's because it's the most important of the three! If we reduce the amount of food we eat, the amount of water we waste, the number of shoes we buy, the number of bags we use, if we reduce the amount of resources we consume the effects will be extremely beneficial. How so? you ask. It's simple really - you reduce the rate of consumption. As I said in the first point, the rate at which The Earth replenished itself is a lot slower than that at which we consume it's resources. By reducing the rate of consumption, we help to keep some resources for the future.

T'is The Season

T'is the season to spend plenty money and waste a lot of it. Whether this post will be of any benefit to you or not I have no idea...leave a comment below and let me know.

I want to share with you my thoughts on Christmas/Holiday shopping and gift giving. I just have three things that comes to my mind. If you have more ideas do share. Leave a comment below!

• Wrap gifts in recycled/reused paper. I don't mean go buy recycled gift wrapping paper. No no no. I mean wrapping gifts in news paper or printer paper that you've printed the wrong thing on, old magazines, etc. That kind of thing. There are a few YouTube videos showing how to make gift bows from tissue paper and/or newspaper. You know already, the majority of people don't save their Christmas wrapping paper. 
• Get unique gifts. Don't fall trap to fancy shamcy things. Go to those little novelty stores and get a unique gift to someone. Even if it is a small basket of handmade organic bath products, or a basket of free trade teas and a mug. Steer clear from impersonal gifts. Get something that the person would actually use or want to use. Wasted gifts is such a shame.
• Send electronic cards. Let's be honest....we throw our cards out the next year. Do we even bother to recycle them? Do we even bother to reuse them for the something else such as decoration? Nope. We don't. So save some paper, some trees and the environment. Send electronic cards.

Yup! That's my tip for Christmas. 

Picture Quote

I don't know anyone that doesn't love getting real mail...bills are not real mail hahaha. So send real mail. Forget the email. Show someone you care. If you know me SEND ME SOMETHING!

Sarah Kay: If I should have a daughter ... | Video on TED.com

Too good not to share. Broaden your mind and explore your world.

Sarah Kay: If I should have a daughter ... | Video on TED.com

Message

Live in colour.

How many times have you said I'll do this later when I have time, when this, when that? Many of us don't seize the moment and really enjoy the little things in life. Buy a camera and if you don't like being in front of it be behind and take pictures. If you can sketch or draw, draw. If you scrapbook, do it! Do it all to remember the good times and if necessary the bad. If remembering the bad helps you remember how far you've come, go for it. But record the triumphs, the victories, the journey. Enjoy the finer things, whether they be the heart on your latte, or a beautiful sunset. Stop reading this and go out and have fun!!!

-The Empress

Words of Wisdom

A friend recently shared this with me and of course I thought it was fitting to share it with you. I'm sure many of you have heard this before of have heard about the general concept before. But here is goes!

The Power of Association.

The Power of Association is too real: "The less you associate with some people, the more your life will improve. Any time you tolerate mediocrity in others, it increases your mediocrity. An important attribute in successful people is their impatience with negative thinking and negative acting people. As you grow, your associates will change. Some of your friends will not want you to go on. They will want you to stay where they are. Friends that don't help you climb will want you to crawl. Your friends will stretch your vision or choke your dream. Those that don't increase you will eventually decrease you.
Consider this: Never receive counsel from unproductive people. Never discuss your problems with someone incapable of contributing to the solution, because those who never succeed themselves are always first to tell you how. Not everyone has a right to speak into your life. You are certain to get the worst of the bargain when you exchange ideas with the wrong person. Don't follow anyone who is not going anywhere. With some people you spend an evening: with others you invest it. Be careful where you stop to inquire for directions along the road of life. Wise is the person who fortifies his life with the right friendships. If you run with wolves, you will learn how to howl, but if you associate with eagles, you will learn how to soar to great heights.
"A mirror reflects a man's face, but what he is really like is shown by the kind of friends he chooses." The simple but true fact of life is that you become like those with whom you closely associate - for the good and the bad. Note: Be not mistaken. This is applicable to family as well as friends".

-Colin Powell.

Scratching The Surface

I hope this post does not get me in trouble but then again, it does represent what is on my mind which I wish to share with all. I will try my utmost to not paint the picture so that everyone can easily comprehend the real who and what in it without losing the essence of the story.

I am concerned about a friend of mine. There is a yearning within me to mentally engaged with this friend but he seems to not want the same. Maybe I shouldn't say he seems not to want the same, but rather it appears that he isn't seeking the same thing at this current moment. My desire may have stemmed from the fact that many other male friends I have have been able to engage me in deep dialogue on a plethora of topics and even with common topics of life there is some depth the conversation. I understand that not everyone is the same, and this one friend may not be able to compare with my older friends. I was having a conversation with one of my girlfriends who knows this new friend and explained my desire for depth to her and she said something very profound to me - "what if he doesn't have the capacity to do so?" This had never crossed my mind until she said it, but a part of me doesn't want to believe it. I feel as if there is something there, that he has some depth to him, and it may be that it needs to be encouraged and cultured. I would be more than willing to help stimulate that sector of his brain which will stimulate mine as well.

My biggest problem now is how do I test out my hypothesis? How do I get a topic that I think is deep, but not too far in, mentally stimulating as well as something that one can formulate an opinion on regardless of the depth of their knowledge on it? It is difficult for me to begin the conversation about x, y and z but it almost pains me to not do it. I don't want to be awkward, nor do I want my friend to feel awkward as well. Does anyone have suggestions as to how I can ease us into a dialogue?


Thanks for reading my pondering and feel free to leave me a comment with some help. Greatly appreciated.

- The Empress

Who's Talking?

I read an article about conversing and one part said that it's good to read the newspaper and stay abreast with issues going on in the world. I want to take this one step further and say that it's good to read in general, and reading about different things can really broaden your horizon and help you to connect with a lot more people.

I came across this article from Planet Earth Online and thought I would share it with you. It may be something you find interesting and worthy or sharing in a discussion with others.


Happy Reading! and Merry Conversations!

- The Empress

Pass It On

It's not that I truly have anything to say to you. I just wanted to tell you that you are beautiful, intelligent, talented and strong.

Go forth and have a great day today.

7 Common Habits of Unhappy People

Well hello there!

I know it's been a while. Things have just been so crazy right now for me. Anyways, I'm part of a support group which consists of some fabulous women. One of these divas shared with us a link - 7 Common Habits of Unhappy People. I read through it and thought hmmm this is definitely worth the share with those who follow my blog.

Hence I have attached a link to the blog so you go check it out! It's okay to be unhappy occasionally. But when it becomes your constant mood, we've got a problem. So cheers to more happy times in life! After all, we only have one to live.


The Empress

It's Never Too Late

Sometimes as students we fall off the good band wagon: the one where you're on top of your readings, assignments, and any other activities you may be involved with. Sometimes we feel like it's hopeless and there's no way we can get back in that zone again.

Don't give up!

It's okay to feel like you've lost control, but you can regain control. Justifiably I've gotta say that you may not get back to an upright position on the horse, but if you're on top of the horse and not being dragged by your feet then that's good, right?

If you're feeling stressed and confused, take a moment to relax, not chill and watch tv relax, but calm within yourself. You can't get anything done if you're stressed. Take a deeeeeep breathe and exhale slowly. When you're done, tell yourself I know I can do this. Start by organizing yourself. See what's more urgent and work on those. The other things gradually get them completed. Make use of empty time. By empty time I mean time on the bus, waiting for class or a meeting, don't go home and come back to the school if you have an hour off. Stay in the school and do some reading, or work on something else that you have to do.

You can do it. So can I. WE can get back on the horse and ride it to victory!

Words of Advice

By far the best profile picture I have ever seen on Facebook EVER!

I'm off...

Restlessness

I long to be a good student, not even a great one...just a good one. But quit often I fall short of my dream and am an okay student, with much potential but seems distracted. You would think after my schpeel about wanting to go to grad school and do my masters I would automatically buck up or settle down, whichever way works for you, and get my work done. No. I still am exceptionally restless and unfocused to give the tasks ahead my all. I don't think I suffer from any attention deficit disorder of any kind. It's just that I can't motivate and mobilize myself to focus. It's odd. It's like the moment I decide to get ready and do work, all the molecules in my body decide to have a dance party and then I can't get that energy to be centered in my brain to concentrate. I become fidgety and am constantly touching something, or fixing something, or thinking something. Okay...that was my ramble to divert myself from doing my work. But I must get something done. I am a good student. Okay is not okay for me ;-)

Reminder

Enthusiasm. Passion. Dedication. 


Define your career, your relationships and your life by these words and you’ll grow in ways you can’t imagine. In a world where we are reminded to “take it easy,” the ones who ignore this advice and give 110% to every thought and every action… they’re the few who will achieve the most. 

DaDa by Layori

A friend shared this song with me, and I've decided to share it will you. Nice groovy feel. Enjoy!

Rick Ross - Aston Martin Music ft. Drake, Chrisette Michele

I like Rick Ross, although I'm not too sure why. Truth be told, it may actually be because of two of my friends who impersonated Rick Ross. Something about that voice (*insert RR grunt). Anyways, enjoy the song!

The Mawez Strikes Again!!

There are just some days when a mawez hits you. It's pretty inexplicable. One moment you're all happy go lucky, the next moment you're just like bleep the world. Well at least that's how it happens to me. Case in point: today. Apart from feeling completely out of the loop and not in the know about what was expected to transpire, I was more or less happy and jolly today. Then came a phone call about some legalities that were overstepped and my afternoon class and I felt so tired, drained, bored and frustrated. One top of that I had a conversation about something I felt like I was being pressured about and hence my rudeness came out. T'is not my intention to be rude...but then again, when do I ever plan it?

I've been reading quite a bit about my zodiac sign and from what I've read when in this mood, I should be left alone to get out of it myself. But how can I effective get out of this mood as soon as possible? Especially in instances where I have class or have to converse with someone I'm not too fond of? Hmmm That is indeed a good question.

If you have any suggestions as to how to get out of a mawez (apart from letting it take it's course), please feel free to let me know. Any feedback will be greatly appreciated.

Clearly I'm not impressed...

Signing off
The Empress

The Times Are Changing

Another school year has started and I believe I have been blessed to be granted the opportunity to take a course with my favourite Indigenous Studies professor - Dan Longboat. Dan is amazing, and extremely inspirational to me, and many other students. This course that I'm taking is entitled Sustainable Indigenous Communities and the idea behind it, or rather the way the class is structured is that we (the students) are part of this community. Right now at the beginning of the academic year is land, water and air. We have no hardware. We have no software. We have no jellyware (I'll explain jellyware soon). Throughout the course of one year/8 months we will develop our community using the indigenous knowledge and concepts we learn in class to make our community sustainable. Each student has to develop one concept, whether hardware or software that contains that element of jellyware that will make everything work well together.

I sat in the front row of class today and listened intently to every word that escaped Dan's mouth; each word carrying an important message not only about how I can pass this course, but also how I can use what I have learnt in this course to make myself and my country a better place. It's rather interesting that at the beginning of class Dan spoke about doing post graduate studies...i.e. getting a Masters or Second Degree. For quite some time I have been disheartened by the option of acquiring a second degree, and have said that I will not do it. Then recently I did say to my close friends Gemma and Tessa (possible Chanel and Christal as well, but I don't remember) that I would eventually do my Masters, and I'd do it at Trent. Why Trent? Why again? Because of the Masters programme in Sustainability that is offered at Trent. Having listened to Dan's schpeel today about the difference between a first and second degree, and the importance of doing one, I have become even more inclined to do one, although not directly after I graduate. So may this post act as a declamation (or is it proclamation?) of my desire to pursue and attain my Masters in Sustainability. Listening to Dan's introduction to the course and also merely introducing myself to the class I was reminded of why I came to Trent and given hope that I can make my dreams and goals a reality in Saint Lucia regardless of the times.

The idea behind the course is that we all are members of a community. And at this current point in the semester, in the academic year, our community is only land, air and water. By the end of the course we would have used indigenous concepts along with our own knowledge of our various communities to create a truly sustainable community. Each student is responsible for one topic/aspect of the community whether hardware or software and they are to be innovative and creative in developing it to be sustainable for the community. I am a bit of a scatterbrain and also lack the drive to finish a task completely, hence this is where I am having a little bit of a problem. I can't figure out what am I most passionate about that I can develop through this assignment, that I can use maybe to do my Masters on and to evoke necessary change in my country. There are a few things I am interested in, but which one of these interests is really a passion; something that will carry me throughout this semester and beyond to be what I want to be and do what I want to do. My choices right now are economics, education, urban housing and energy. The more I type, and the more I think about it, the more I feel like education is my calling. Maybe I can investigate that a bit more in terms of my own development, but for the class I will look at what aspects of education and sustainability I can bring to the table. That is not to say that I cannot investigate the other aspects which interest me, to help me be more well rounded. It's just that my primary focus would be education.

I need to remind myself that even though things don't work out the way we want them to, or the way we think they should in hindsight, it doesn't mean that we cannot make it work in the future, or that it isn't the path we were suppose to take altogether. Maybe this actually is my calling. That I am to have all this detailing to my shield and heart which is deeply rooted in education. Maybe my eyes only let me see the option to teach or to be a teacher, whereas the universe, God and everything have me listed to be an educator. The future is looking brighter. The times are changing. I need not limit myself to what I could have done, instead I need to focus on what I can do and should do.

Day Thirty! - 30 Day Challenge

This is the final day of the challenge. And the last thing on that list is One thing you're excited for.

There are quite a few things I could choose but I'm gonna say one thing I'm excited about is convocation and getting my Honours degree!! Yea baby!!!


What's one thing you're excited about? Feel free to share it with me.

The Empress

Day Twenty Nine! - 30 Day Challenge

Five weird things you like

I wasn't too sure how to go about this. I can't say anything cool weird like I enjoy eating chocolate grasshoppers or I like when spiders walk across my face O_o. I hope what I perceive as weird doesn't weird anyone else out lol. So in no order of weirdness or enjoyment, 5 weird things I like:

• uncooked macaroni (elbows) and soy sauce.....it just tastes good to me lol
• picking my nose.....I only do this at home and I wash my hands afterwards (this is so embarrassing lmao)
• scratching my armpit.....it feels good (hangs head in shame lol)
• sitting on my palms....it may look like I just want to touch my bum or something, but I'm not. Just like sitting on my hands 
• wearing super sized bingo bags aka granny panties! THEY'RE SO COMFY!!!! lol

Those are my five weird things I like...What are yours?

SOS 30 Day Challenge

One of the blogs I follow is having a 30 Day Challenge and I think I'm going to attempt to do it. I don't think I will share my posts with everyone, but instead do it just for me. If you want, and I suggest you do, you can join along and do the challenge. Her blog is Struggles of the Strong. Have fun! Feel free to leave a comment on her blog under any of her posts as well! Heck, just follow her blog as well!

Love ya peoples

Day Twenty Eight! - 30 Day Challenge

Somewhere you'd like to visit

Somewhere implies one place, and this may cause a problem, for I have so many friends from all over the whole that I can't say one place and not say another. So I will list a few places I want to visit. Note: a few, not all.

• Ethiopia
• Nigeria
• Zimbabwe
• South Africa
• Niger
• Congo
• Finland
• Belize
• Anguilla
• The Bahamas
• Saudi Arabia
• The Netherlands
• Bhutan
• Jordan
• Turkey
• Malaysia
• Haiti

Yea....I guess I could say everywhere in the world, but not really. Not yet at least

Where would you like to visit? Please do share

Day Twenty Seven! - 30 Day Challenge

 A quote you try to live by

"Only God can judge me."

It was kinda hard to choose the proper wording for the quote, but I settled on this one. What I wanted to portray, and maybe if you k now a better one you can share it with me, is that I don't chastise or ostracize people because of what they choose to do. I try to be Christ-like and hence I tell myself that if for example you identify as a homosexual or you're a fan of inter-racial couples, or you choose not to eat pork, or not to do something, that is your choice. I will treat you as I treat myself or even better and I will not judge you for your choices. I'm sure there are things I do that others can cast their rod of disapproval on me for, but I don't care because at the end of the day God's judgement is all that I should be concerned about. He knows what I have done, and I know he knows. When he comes to judge me, he will not have audience around him advising him on what to do with me. He will not have anyone come up and read a list of my sins and/or play a video of my life. He gave me the right to choose and I've chosen what I have and I will deal with the consequences when they come. I don't need you to remind me or predict for me. You do your do and imma do mine.

What's a quote you try to live by? Do feel free to share.

Day Twenty Six! - 30 Day Challenge

Things you like and dislike about yourself

Things I dislike (start with what you don't like and then finish with what you like):

• The way I procrastinate. If you know me well enough you know that when I have the most assignments due I'm planning an event or cleaning the house to a T. When I should be preparing for exams I'm walking an entire season of ANTM or Project Runway. And a lot of the times I'm beating myself up for it, but I won't change lol
• The amount of hair I have on my body!! The levels of testosterone pumping through my body making me like this is ridiculous! It's just crazy!!

Things I like:

• My inner strength. When I make up my mind to do something, I go hard or I go home. I don't use anything as an excuse to be lazy or a victim. 
• My ability to motivate and mobilize people. For someone my age I think it's a pretty amazing skill. True there are some people who don't know the difference between professional and personal and will think that I'm hating on them or I don't like them, but that's your issue if you can't realise that my world doesn't revolve around you.
• My laughs - all of them! I love laughing. So good for my heart hahahaha
• My body (as discussed in a previous post available here)
• My life! The good, the bad, the ugly. 

What do you like and dislike about yourself? Feel free to share


The Empress

Day Twenty Five! - 30 Day Challenge

Something you're currently worried about

I am worried about my health. I know that I don't eat properly, and I don't do the necessary maintenance procedures, but that doesn't change the fact that I am worried about my health.

I'm really tired and don't feel like typing a lot so pardon me. Maybe you can share with me something you are currently worried about.

Day Twent Four! - 30 Day Challenge

Five words/phrases that make you laugh


This is a hard one because 1. I'm always laughing at things and 2. I'm never paying attention to remember something like this. Can I get back to you on this one??


What words make you laugh? Maybe if you share with me I can tell I agree.

The Empress

Day Twenty Three! - 30 Day Challenge

Something you miss

I miss my lil bro. He's 6 years my junior and we have such an amazing relationship. We just joke around and chill and I miss doing that with him. We talk on the phone every so often, but it's not the same as being in his presence. I miss bringing him out and showing him the ropes of the world hahaha. The sad thing is unless he comes up with my mom for my convocation next year I might not see him for a whole 3 years straight! Or unless I send a ticket for him to come visit, which can be done. I have 5 brothers and I must say that my lil bro is probably the one I'm closet with.

I LOVE YOU BROSKI!!! *heart* *heart*

What do you miss? If you leave a comment as anonymous please leave a name or initials or something. THANKS!

The Empress

Day Twenty Two! - 30 Day Challenge

Your academics

I'm not that crazy to discuss them!! lol. Take it how you want. hahaha

Day Twenty One! - 30 Day Challenge

How you hope your future will be like

The not too distant future I hope to be working, doing something I enjoy/am interested in, living on my own in a lovely high rise apartment building on the 12th floor or so in Whitby or Ajax or Pickering. Probably still not knowing how to drive and hence not having a car lol.

In the distant future I see myself living in my solar powered house, with wonderful sustainable and environmentally sound elements like bamboo flooring, the use of recycled glass, rain collectors, and things of that sort. I will be married, can't see children right now...who knows, they may just be in their rooms lol. I will be driving and I will own a car. A cute one, like a Mini Coop or a Beetle lol.

In the super distant future, I see myself on a porch swing, rocking back and forth with my husband. Still looking good for my age, healthy, watching my grandchildren (so I guess the children were in their rooms lol), having a cute puppy, a fluffly one, we would have had a chocolate or black lab already, still enjoying my property.

That's what I see, what about you? Where do you see yourself in the future?


The Empress

Day Twenty! - 30 Day Challenge

Your fears

*inhales deeply....sigh*
Do I have to? Okay, so one fear is being alone (forever). I feel like I have so much love inside of me that I can't keep. I must share it. To be alone (forever) would be devastating. I've been told by somebody that it's impossible for me to be alone. I hope that's true, but with that I also want to say I hope that I'm not unhappy and not alone......because I think I would choose being alone instead of being unhappy.


What do you fear? Do let me know

Day Nineteen! - 30 Day Challenge

Five things you lust after

This is going to be very interesting lol, but here we go! Five things I lust after:

• strong, healthy teeth (yes I just said it, teeth)
• a great and beautiful shoe closet
• financial comfort....i.e. MONEY. No comments on that lol
• a stable, healthy relatiionship with amazing sex
• a car? hahaha 

In my my mind I don't really lust after things, but these are the 5 things I could come up with.

What are five things you lust after?

The Weeknd - High For This

Maybe I just jumped on the bandwagon....but I like The Weeknd. This is one of his songs that I enjoy.

Day Eighteen! - 30 Day Challenge

A problem that you've had

This problem thankful has not be acting up as much as before, so I'm really grateful for that. I have had an issue with my right wrist. Apparently fluid from my joint collected outside of the joint and added some pressure to my wrist, making it a tad bit uncomfortable but not unbearable to move it. There was a visible depression in my wrist. My doctor, specialist guy, suggested having surgery to remove the fluid, but I opted not to. I would have had a tiny scar, barely noticable, but I still decided not to. As I said earlier, it hasn't been acting up in a while so no worries there.

Want to share a problem you've been having?

The Empress

Day Seventeen! - 30 Day Challenge

Something you're proud of

This is a tough question to answer. What am I proud of?? After much contemplation and accessing my emotion I think I am going to say that I am proud of my friend Ashni Ramsammy. I know Ashni is a someone not something, but I couldn't think of a thing.

Ashni has been such an inspiration to me in the past few months. This young lady has grown and is continuing to grow and blossom into a fine young lady who is driven, self motivated, decisive, approachable and professional. Ashni knows what she wants in life and she is making strides to get it! Nothing is going to get in her way. If something attempts to she will find a way through it, over it, under it or around it. I am proud of her because of the growth I have seen in her. When I met she was a wonderful young lady but still a fragile flower bud. But throughout the course of our friendship I have watched her grow (and I think I'm allowed to say help her grow as well) into who she is today. Another reason why I am so proud of her is that she has now become such a strong person of character that she can be a rock when I need her. The energy and synergy between the two of us is amazing!

All in all - I am proud of my friend for having a dream and working to make it her reality!


What's something (or someone) you're proud of??

Day Sixteen! - 30 Day Challenge

Something you always think "what if" about


If you know me well enough you should know the answer to this...what if I pursued my dream of being a performer on stage.

If you know me and not even well enough, but if you've seen me on stage you can tell that I love it! I love being on stage whether it be performing or hosting, I was born to be on stage! Sadly the culture back home is not one that heavily promotes The Arts as a livelihood and hence my dreams of being a performer, being an artist, were not supported as much as being an environmentalist. I've never considered myself the best dancer out there. Truth be told in my ballet classes I always thought of myself as the worst of the best. The best because I made it so far, but still in comparison to the other lovely ladies I danced with, I always thought I was the worst. The thing I know I have is stage presence and energy. Many persons have told me that I'm a natural born performer and when on stage it's hard to take your eyes off me. Oh well.

This summer I met someone who is living my dream. He works as a dancer. Gets paid and pays his bill from dancing...and I'm not talking go go dancer, I'm talking legit performer. Meeting him has given me hope that I can persue some sort of my dream of being on stage. I think I'm going to looking to being a part of a musical or something. I'm not the best singer out there, I don't think I'm the worst (I'm not tone deaf), but maybe I can give it a shot and see what will happen. Who knows, my what if may become an I did.


What is a "what if" that's been on your mind for some time?

Day Fifteen! - 30 Day Challenge

What is your zodiac/horoscope and if you think it suits your personality

I am a Cancer and YES! I think my sign suits me very well. I follow @ZodiacFacts on Twitter and there are quite a number of things about Cancers that I have to retweet or nod and say YES!! How did you know?! lol. I am a Cancer and I Love It!!


What about you? What's your zodiac sign and do you think it suits your personality?

Relationships

Disclaimer: I am no expert...heck I don't even have legit experience lol. I'm just talking (well typing what's on my mind). If anything doesn't seem to flow, I apologize. I'm a bit of a scatter brain at times.

I came across this website Facts About Boys and found some of the things I looked at a bit interesting. My good friend Ashni posted on her blog (Struggles of the Strong) asking why do guys start getting into a girl and then plap just stop calling and the Facts gave some good indicators to know when a guy has rejected you (I find rejected such a harsh word, but that may be because it happened to me lol). I found it quite humourous actually, that the first indicator of you've been rejected is "he stops calling you/returning or replying to your messages." Okay. Wow. Ouch. Slap in the face much? Yea, it is. I don't get why people aren't open and honest. What if I'm a bit slow and suffer from Delayed Reaction Syndrome and hence pick up on these things a bit later than other people?!? Why can't you just say hey I've got what I wanted, I'm out. Or conversely, I'm just not that into you anymore.

Sometimes I think it's easy for me to say that because I'm a lot tougher (at least in my mind) than a lot of other girls who can't handle the harsh, point blank truth. I don't really like people watering down things or buttering it up. Sometimes the cold hard truth is best. So maybe there's some guy out there who's reading this shaking his head saying these women don't know what they want. It's not that we don't know what we want, it's just that we're all different lol. How does a guy know which woman can handle to point blank truth, and which one can't? Sigh. I guess you pay attention and see how tough they are. But that entails actually paying full attention to them, getting to know them, and that still might lead to pity for getting so far along and then ploop, dropping them. Relationships are complicated. And some people are snakes.


Well that's all the blabbering I'll be doing today. What are your thoughts on my randomness (if it makes any sense at all :S I need to work on that for real). How do you decipher who to be frank with and who needs to have tricks and pointers thrown at them?


The Empress

Day Fourteen! - 30 Day Challenge

What you wore today


Well, I didn't have to go to work today so for the majority of the day, once I got out of bed I just has on a wrap, tied around my neck and secured with a belt. Later on in the day I had to shoot a video so I wore an army green fitted cargo pants, grey V neck shirt, denim waistcoat (dressed with some badges). I was going for a kinda military look.

Day Thirteen! - 30 Day Challenge

Your opinion on your body and how comfortable you are with it

I have my issues with my body but generally speaking, I adore my body. The stretch marks, moles, hairs, birthmark, curves and lack there of. I love myself and my body. Surely there are things that I wish I could have changed, or I wish were different (well not really) but still, I've grown to appreciate the vessel I've been given and because of that I understand that there are things I don't like but I don't let it control me. If it's something I can change for example - get more toned - I change it. Go to the gym, etc. If it's something that will either require a lot of work or money or cannot change, I just leave it alone. If anyone doesn't like anything about me....BAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!!!!!!! You thought I'd care? Ummmm no! It's mine. My body and if you don't like something don't look at me! lol. I think the obsession with being perfect instead of being natural is ridiculous. I love me (8) just the way I am!!!!! (8) And you should too ;-)

The Empress

Day Twelve! - 30 Day Challenge

Five guys whom you find attractive

In no particular order:

Idris Elba

Marlon Palmer - follow him on Twitter @ThatDudeMCFLY. He's so funny and real! Fabulous guy!

Vybz Kartel

BAHAHAH!!!! Kiddingggggggggggg!

Al Green...he's got one of those baby faces

Dwyane Wade (yes I know a bunch of people who are mad right now lol, but oh well!! I think he's attractive. What can I say?!)

Last and by no means least (he's so delicious!! I wished so badly to see him as a guest judge when I went to see So You Think You Can Dance Canada...but alas he wasn't *sad face*)

Nico Archambault - Season One Winner of So You Think You Can Dance Canada!!

So, give me 5 men/women you find attractive

Day Eleven! - 30 Day Challenge

Your family


What about them? I love my biological family. And the other families I have been adopted into are awesome as well. That's about it lol.


Your family...what would your answer be?

The Empress

Day Ten! - 30 Day Challenge

Put your music player on shuffle and write the first ten songs that play

• The Weeknd - Wicked Games
• John Legned and Brandy - Quickly
• Adele - Take It All
• India Arie - The One
• The Cranberries - Linger
• Notch - Nuttin A Gwan So
• Sedale - Nah Stop Whinning
• Ricky T - OK There
• Gwen Stefani - Harajuku Girls
• India Arie - Ready for Love

What ten tracks came up on your music player?

Day Nine! - 30 Day Challenge

How important you think education is

Wow! Do I have enough time or energy to talk about this? Way to tired for it, but I've gotta answer the question!!

Okay. So I'm assuming that the writer of this list was thinking along the lines of traditional education. I  think traditional education is important because it helps you attain success within our society. The limitations that traditional education has is the biggest problem with it. I think education should be free and not so bloody expensive! Something that will take supposedly take persons from poverty to not even riches but comfort is very restricted. I also think that when getting an education, do what you're interested is and you will go far, but that doesn't mean that whatever you do, even if you're not into it can't be useful at some time.

All in all (and I do apologize for the crappy post), I think education is important, and if you have the opportunity to get an education in something, take it. You never know when you may be able to use it.

How important is education to you? And how did you perceive this question?

Day Eight! - 30 Day Challenge

What you ate today


In order

• two chocolate truffles (yes...I had chocolate for breakfast)
• cesaer salad (no I'm not trying to make up for the chocolate I ate...I was just really hungry and wanted something substantial)
• chewy oat and chocolate Fiber One bar
• chocolate-raspberry tea (in case you didn't know, yes I am addicted to chocolate)
• Quaker Cheddar Crispy Minis
• pretzels
• 7 Up
• rice, salad and stewed chicken

Yes, I know....*hangs head in shame* What I eat is terrible!! Where's the calcium?! Where's the dairy? =( I'm going to work on that

What did you eat today? Do share!

The Empress

Day Seven! - 30 Day Challenge

Five pet peeves 

Oh boy...what to choose. Some of these I've spoken about but hey, I'll mention them again!

In no particular order of hatred, 5 of my pet peeves:

• Guys with their pants half way down their thighs. See I don't mind part of your boxers showing...BUT THE WHOLE THINGS?!?! Really? sigh. Moving on
• Dirty bathrooms. Just..just disgusting. If you're using the toilet, flush. Don't get it on the seat, or the floor! Oh gosh...moving on!
• You're on the bus or in a building and someone is having a conversation via text/bbm/whatever on their cell phone and they have a ringtone/sound for when they get a message. The phone is in their hand and it's still making a sound...CONTINUALLY!! Every two second ding ding ding dong. ding ding ding dong. ding ding ding dong. PUT IT ON SILENT!! ARGGG!!! That's a big one. My phone is 95% of the time set to Phone Calls Only - it rings only when it's a call. And trust me when I tell you noone calls me. Sigh. I just. Can't. Hate it.
• People who refuse to be open minded...Case in point - a number of international students tell you international students are not rich. You still don't listen and keep say nah nah they're rich because they're paying $17 000 a year for tuition..................Do you know what a student loan or a double mortaged house or land is?! LISTEN TO WHAT THE INTERNATIONAL STUDENTS ARE TELLING YOU ABOUT WHAT THEY HAVE TO DO TO GET AN EDUCATION!!!!! Sigh. That's just one example. I'm not even going to talk about more.
• This one's pretty simple - having wet socks. I hate wearing sneakers/runners/whatever you call them and my socks get wet because it was raining heavily or I stepped in a puddle. Wet socks are not fun times.

Those are five of my pet peeves. Do you share the same ones I do?? What are five of your pet peeves? Leave a comment below!!

The Empress

Day Six! - 30 Day Challenge

Your views on mainstream music

Sigh. This is going to be a difficult one. As with everything in life, there is good and there is bad. I think the majority of mainstream music is a bunch of crap. By mainstream I mean what's played ont he radio, because in my mind there is rock mainstream if you listen to a rock station or you're a fan of rock, etc for each genre out there. But if you turn on a "regular" radio station I think the majority of the music is crappy.

Music once had a message of truth, a story of love, a movement for action. Now music just says do stupidness. There is a good bit of music that should be "mainstream" or rather should get more publicity, more airtime but is not, for whatever reason. There are so many artists that have a good, positive message that can uplift society, but instead the radio constantly pays shake your ass, in the club hooking up, thug life, and the works.

My views on mainstream music is that there are a few needles made of gold hidden within the piles a rotting hay. What are your views on mainstream music? Feel free to share! If you're leaving a comment with an anonymous profile, feel free to leave a name or initials or something.

The Empress

Day Five! - 30 Day Challenge

Things you want to say to an ex


I'm sure you might be expecting some long winded you missed out on a  great thing blah blah blah kinds shpeel. There is just one thing I want to tell all my exes and that is

THANK YOU!

Realistically all my past relationships have shaped me to become the woman I am right now, and I love me as I am. Current relationships will continue to shape me into hopefully a better person for the times ahead. But I won't dwell on what didn't work out and what I was bad at or what you were bad at. It doesn't matter when I think about it.

To make a side note: on Twitter there was a #TT (trending topic) which was #MessagesToMyEx and some of the things people were saying...HOLLAYY!!! One girl tweeted thanks for Chlamydia...what's wrong with these kids?? I know I've tweeted some things I shouldn't have but whoa...sigh. Anyways, some other people tweeted some good things, others clearly were bitter and needed some closure or therapy or sumn. But who am I to say such. Anyways, I digress.

If you had a chance to tell an ex something, what would you say? Please do share.

The Empress

Day Four! - 30 Day Challenge

Bullet your day

• Wake up, bathe
• Eat breakfast
• Go to church
• Come back home
• Eat lunch
• Sit, talk, laugh
• Watch movies
• Sleep...

That's about it lol

Day Three! - 30 Day Challenge

A book you love


I don't read much, although I am trying to break that habit. Anyways I digress. One of the best books I have read surprisingly was a text for a course of mine. The name of the book is "The Words That Come Before All Else." If you get a chance to read it, do so, and if you do, do it with an open mind and heart. The book is more or less the shortened version of the Creation Story of the Haudenosaunee Peoples. I really enjoyed that class and the book helps me to remember what was taught in the class.

Happy Reading!

The Empress

Day Two! - 30 Day Challenge

Something you feel strongly about


I'm not very emotional about anything right now, or rather nothing comes to mind, although I know if someone starts to talk to me about some pertinent issue I'll get riled up.

I think I'm going to settle on the education system in Saint Lucia, or to narrow it down and relate it to me I will look at teaching and me. I taught for two years before coming to university and I honestly loved it. Many days I wished I didn't stop but everything happens for a reason right? The power I had as a teacher was amazing and I don't think I abused it. The passion I had as a teacher surpasses any passion I have while in class becoming an environmentalist. It really makes me wonder whether being an environmentalist is my second passion or third. I won't answer that because I think I know the answer. Anyways. I was an untrained teacher when I began, fresh out of community college and a sweet 19 among 16 and 17 year olds. Even though I was fairly young I found a way to command respect from my students and I even commanded it from my peers as well.

I loved teaching because I felt like I was making a valuable contribution to my country. I felt like I was responsible for shaping an portion of an entire generation of people and even though I lasted only two years, I hope that the minor changes I began are carried by all my students throughout their life. The power of a good teacher is amazing. Teachers inspire and mold so many young people. I strongly believe that if you're not strong enough to bare it, leave it, regardless of whether you've been in it for years. One of the best compliments I have ever received in my life is not about my dancing, or getting a 90% on a lab of mine. It's hearing a trained colleague of mine say you were one of the best teachers this school has ever had. It means so much to me to know that not only do my students see that I tried very hard to make them the best I could make them be, but my peers also noticed my hard work as well. Again I say I love teaching. Maybe I will go back when I graduate. Find a way to do it. Who knows. We will see.

Teachers shape the world. Much respect to all the hard working and passionate teachers out there. If you're a teacher and you're not passionate about what you do, trust my untrained ass when I say get out. Don't stay and frustrate yourself or mess up a generation of potential.


What do you feel strongly about? Please do share!

Day One! - 30 Day Challenge

Five ways to win my heart (in no specific order)

• FOOD!!!! Being able to cook is a plus, but being willing to learn how to cook and make mistakes while cooking and trying new things is a super plus!
• Having a genuine interest in The Arts: music, dance, film, theatre, poetry/spoken word, visual art, is there such a thing as tangible art? If so, tangible art!
• Having a great sense of humour...goodness knows this girl right hurrr loves to laugh
• Being trustworthy. If I can trust you to do something important for me continually and not to do what I would want, but to do something that I would enjoy or appreciate, that's big
• Being down-to-earth but not bare basic cheap. I mean you don't have to buy cereal for $30 if you can get a good one for $10 likewise we don't have to go to dinner and spend $400 when we can have a picnic on the beach that came up to $30. But with that being said, we can still go to a nice restaurant or show every so often and have a good time.

What are five ways to win your heart? Share them with me in the comments below =) Maybe you have something I didn't think of. This challenge thing is hard you know lollol.

The Empress

Frank Ocean

I know some people must being saying Oh Lord this girl late you know! She now talking about Ocean. Cha man! True, I may be late but that doesn't mean I can't!

In case you were like me and never saw a pic of him, this is what he looks like. I won't lie, for some odd reason I thought the guy was Caucasian! I have noooo idea why. Anyway, Frank Ocean is this guy who is making waves with his delicious music. Frank Ocean, legally known as Christopher Breaux, is a 24 year old song writer from Louisiana. I love his music. It's somehow very comforting to me. Thus far my favourite songs from him are: Nature Feels, Swim Good, If I'm In Love, There Will Be Tears and Novacane.

If you haven't, I would suggest giving him a listen. You can always start by listening to my favs hahaha.


Do you love Frank Ocean? Lemme know! Drop a line in the comments below and let me know which songs you adore! Happy listening kids!

The Empress

The 30 Day Challenge

CLEARLY! I have nothing else to do, so I looked up 30 day challenge and decided to do one of the many possible 30 day challenges out there. The one I have decided to do is from http://30daychallengearchive.tumblr.com/ 

Feel free to go through the tumblr account and find a 30 day challenge you want to do!

Thought

" Life isn't that serious...Laugh a little"

Cheers To A Wonderful Weekend

I just felt the need to do a post saying THANK YOU to my amazing dance buddy Sugaray Robinson who organized a trip for us to come down to Toronto to attend The Beatdown Dance Competition. I haven't seen any of these friends since their convocation, or my birthday in June (or in Dev's case well before that I think). It was just so amazingly refreshing to reunite with them and have an awesome time telling stories, jokes, enjoying good food and amazing dancing!

I missed you guys!! And I am glad to know that time apart did not and will not equate to friendships lost. So this morning I raise my glass to you and say Cheers To A Wonderful Weekend!!

758 - We Large!!

Hello Hello!!

I could say this is my boy yea yea rae-tae-tae but I won't. I will however say that I do know this young man Kayo and I love this song. By the first 5 seconds I knew I'd love it.

Anyways, I'm doing choreography for my school's dance team and was determined to use his music. I shared it with my captains and fellow choreographers and I believe my wish will be granted!! Woop woop!

Have a listen to this one and of course all his others. Let me know what you think of this one in the comments below, and if you love the music like I do, you can download the tracks off of iTunes.

Holla!

The Empress

False Witness

Show of hands, how many people hate liars? I know I do! The primary reason why I hate liars is because I feel like my trust has been taken for granted. When I converse with someone I speak the truth or maybe I should say I try not to lie, and hence I assume that the person I am conversing with is also telling the truth/trying not to lie.

I think this is a very crucial point especially when you've just met somebody. Tell me, how the frankincense are you going to lie to me about simple things when you're trying to establish a bon/relationship with me? Now I don't mean relationship like man-woman-lovers relationship, I'm talking interaction between people relationship. I met this guy recently and he seemed cool and all. We've been talking quite a bit, can't wait to meet up again, rae-tay-tay (blah blah blah in other words) and then I find out this guy lied about something as simple as a Facebook account.....O_o yes, I said it - A FACEBOOK ACCOUNT! What ya got to hide bud?? He said he didn't have one and I immediately said cool. I know a few people who don't have Facebook accounts so that's normal to me. But somehow it didn't sit well with my gut. A few weeks later I randomly decided to search his name. Figured it would be interesting to see the other people in the world that had his name (yes I actually, genuinely believed that...I google my friends all the time - no I'm not creepy ]=  ) then lo and behold, his profile shows up with a picture of him so I can't say maybe it was someone else lol. How do you think I felt? How would you feel?!?! Interesting... Of course I get on edge and begin to doubt everything this guy's said to me. My trust in you has immediately been  broken and luckily for you partially lost. I don't think this guy realises how hard it is to get my trust back, but I continue. So I call him out on it and I get some excuse about him not using it much. I still don't buy in although I answer alright, cool cool to him. My mind is wondering what are you trying to hide?? Then he confesses he lied about his age and is actually 5 years younger than he originally said. I let that slide. Age is but a number, but this still doesn't change the fact that I think you're shady. Then he asks me what lies do I have to fess up to...-_- excuse me?? I enjoy a good laugh and good prank so I said I was actually born a man and had a sex change 3 years ago. Of course this guy probably shit his pants. Then I quickly told him it was a joke (see the difference). I also let him know that I don't lie.

Even after that confession session, I am still having doubts about this guy. I still cannot trust him completely. I'm not dismissing what has happened because my gut tells me there's something not right, something untrue, but still I'm not sending him packing. What am I not seeing? I want to know!!

How would you react if you were in my shoes? What do you think I should do? Leave a comment below and remember to check back for a response =)

Remember:

If you have nothing to hide, why lie?

The Empress 

Visual Motivation

When setting a goal it's good to have a model to work towards. Right now I'm working on my figure (yes I know so many people now want to beat me up for saying that, but!! in my defense, I don't care what you think of my figure. My view is all that matters. It's not like I'm going to become anorexic or anything...I love food too much and hate regurgitating way too much), so I have sourced some photos to help me remember this is what I'm working towards. And knowing me...I won't get there lol. I'll get half way and be satisfied and work to maintain the half way mark hahahaha.

But in any case, what makes you happy right? The next post will be on exercises and general things you can do to help you get a figure like that, or like mine if you think mine is amazing already.

from http://www.workoutplansforwomen.com/ab-workouts-for-women/

from http://www.nowloss.com/how-to-get-a-flat-stomach-abs-like-jessica-alba.htm

from http://www.thetruthaboutcorestrength.com/pilates-ants/

from http://www.healblog.net/body/stomach-crunches-for-a-flatter-stomach/

I visited all these sites to see what information they have on ab workouts and truth be told, only the first link seemed to have given me something I would put my name on. You can check out the others and see how you feel about them, but I'm gonna stick with the good old fashion exercises suggested in the first link.

Friendship and Reciprocity

I'm not sure how many times I spoke about my expectations regarding friendship but I shall speak about it today.

I was having a conversation with a buddy of mine, Mike (not a sexual buddy for the record) and he mentioned some difficulty he was experiencing. My response to him was don't let it get to you. You tried and it's not working out. You have other things you need to focus your attention on; and furthermore, you should just surround yourself with positive people. No time for negativity. Later on that night I got into an argument and needed some moral and emotional support from a friend. Another friend of mine (Ashni) came to my rescue and gave me just what I needed whether or not I wanted it. I am so grateful for friends who are able to help me in my time of weakness; friends who can tell me what I would say to them if the tables were turned. Ashni provided a viewing of reality and the truth. Although I haven't cried enough yet (which isn't that good. I completely support and condone crying), I did cry and I have began healing.

I know that Mike would have been able to help me out the way Ashni did and again I say I am grateful to those persons I have in my life that I can lean on, count on, cry on and laugh with. These people help to make life worth living.

To all my friends, buddies, peoples I know, acquaintances, etc. Thank You for being in my life and making it worth living.

"To have a friend is to be a friend"

 Shani Vee

The Empress

Real Talk

I know we agreed to not talk about this again but I need to clear my chest so I can move on.

I know it, yet still I do contrary. After 8 years of being there for me, of frustrating me, almost getting me in trouble, making me laugh, smile and turning red like a tomato, you would think I would get it. You would think you would get it.

I don't know what to do. I want to love you and give you all of me...but the more I try and the more I think about it, the more I am beginning to think that maybe it shouldn't be. You love me for me. You see my genius, my brilliance, my beauty, my splendor, yet still I don't see half of what you see and I try to change like a sheep to please you.

We can't get married; not now, not soon. It's not that I don't love you, I do, and maybe I love you too much. But the reason why it can't happen is because I will never be happy, if now. I'm too fragile and malleable at this point and you need a rock, Xena Warrior Princess. Until that point when I can handle my own and be a strong woman not around everyone - just around you, then and only then will we be able to join in a union.

Having you end the argument is not the way for us to do things. It doesn't mean that I won. Getting you mad or flustered is not winning. This is not winning.

Sigh. Our relationship is frustrating me. I want it to work for me.

So much to learn. So much room to grow.

Your Nefertiti

The Verdict

I have deleted the newest blog and will keep Dancer's Feet and The Spotted Fashionista. Anything that I would have had to say in Green Eyes. Green Heart can be said here and tagged appropriately.

Thanks for bearing with me and my decisions.

The Jury Is Still Out

I'm still trying to decide what to do with my blogs. I currently have THREE and I think something needs to go. My latest blog is geared towards my major - an avenue to develop my professional opinion and share it with the world. I think that one is not working for me. It doesn't feel like the right move to make. Instead I could just use this blog to discuss such topics, so I might just delete that blog. And my fashion blog...it hasn't been really active either, but I'm not sure I want to transfer my fashion ideas to this blog. ARG!!! So many decisions!!

What do you suggest? What do you think I should do?

Life, According to Bill Gates

My mom sent me this email and I wanted to share it with you.

Bill Gates recently gave a speech at a High School about eleven (11) things they did not and will not learn in school.

 

He talks about how feel-good, politically correct teachings created a generation of kids with no concept of reality and how this concept set them up for failure in the real world.

Rule 1 : Life is not fair - get used to it!  

Rule 2 : The world doesn't care about your self-esteem. The world will expect you to accomplish something BEFORE you feel good about yourself.

Rule 3 : You will NOT make $60,000 a year right out of high school. You won't be a vice-president with a car phone until you earn both. 

Rule 4 : If you think your teacher is tough, wait till you get a boss.  

  

Rule 5 : Flipping burgers is not beneath your dignity. Your Grandparents had a different word for burger flipping: They called it opportunity.
 
Rule 6 : If you mess up, it's not your parents' fault, so don't whine about your mistakes, learn from them.
 
Rule 7 : Before you were born, your parents weren't as boring as they are now. They got that way from paying your bills, cleaning your clothes and listening to you talk about how cool you thought you were. So before you save the rain forest from the parasites of your parent's generation, try delousing the closet in your own room..
  
Rule 8 : Your school may have done away with winners and losers, but life HAS NOT. In some schools, they have abolished failing grades and they'll give you as MANY TIMES as you want to get the right answer.

*This doesn't bear the slightest resemblance to ANYTHING in real life.
 
 Rule 9 : Life is not divided into semesters. You don't get summers off and very few employers are interested in helping you FIND YOURSELF.

*Do that on your own time.

Rule 10 : Television is NOT real life. In real life people actually have to leave the coffee shop and go to jobs.
 

Rule 11 : Be nice to nerds.Chances are you'll end up working for one.